1
00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:21,800
[man] Stand by,
everybody, as we turn

2
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:23,440
the calendar back 500 years

3
00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:26,600
and bring you the 123rd running
of the Canterbury Tournament.

4
00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:28,400
The weather is clear,
and it looks

5
00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:31,120
as if attendance records
will be smashed.

6
00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:32,240
Yes, sirree.

7
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:40,560
Red-hot plum pudding.
Plum pudding here.

8
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,200
Get your programs here.

9
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:45,760
You can't tell one knight
from another without a program.

10
00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:48,040
[man] To the winner of this
famous tournament today

11
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,960
will go riches, honor and
glory, and the frail, white,

12
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:53,400
delicate hand of the princess,
Esmeralda,

13
00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:56,920
- fairest flower
in all the kingdom. - [men whistling]

14
00:00:58,040 --> 00:00:59,800
Ya-hoo!

15
00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:01,720
[man] What a prize for
stout-hearted knights

16
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:02,960
to do and die for.

17
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:05,360
We take you to the challenger,
Sir Loinsteak.

18
00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:07,920
Fourteen points of brawn,
muscle and courage.

19
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:10,960
Blonde and blue-eyed, ready to
go against the champion

20
00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:14,400
for the heavyweight slugging
title of the British Empire.

21
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,720
Here we have the little man
who, since morning,

22
00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:21,760
has been preparing
his knight for the big day.

23
00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,160
Introducing Cedric,
the loyal servant,

24
00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:27,200
who dreams of some afternoon
when he will become a knight

25
00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:29,920
and face death for the smile
of a lovely princess.

26
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,920
[sighs deeply]

27
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,760
[man] But today
Cedric duty is to see to it

28
00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:35,320
that his master is overhauled.

29
00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:37,720
New piston rings,
brakes realigned,

30
00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:40,400
body simonized
and a change of oil.

31
00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:57,520
The big moment's close.

32
00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:59,600
The crowd is on its toes
and yelling for action.

33
00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:02,240
We go into final preparations
for the big event.

34
00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:05,760
The all-important touches that
may snatch victory from defeat.

35
00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,360
[sounding]

36
00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:10,640
Uh-oh! Hurry, Cedric, hurry!

37
00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:17,960
[shatters]

38
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:22,000
Get rid of it, stupid.
Anywhere. Under the rug.

39
00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:23,680
No time to lose.

40
00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:26,080
Before you can say "Jack
Robinson" the gladiators'll

41
00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:29,480
be out there, slugging it
out for the championship.

42
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:31,040
Betting favors the champion,

43
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,560
but the challenger is going in
with confidence.

44
00:02:33,640 --> 00:02:36,520
There may be an upset if
Sir Loinsteak turns the tables.

45
00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:40,040
Matter of seconds before
the two contestants meet face-to-face.

46
00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:43,520
The last-minute... But wait!
Something's gone wrong here.

47
00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:45,720
Sir Loinsteak is completely
out. A cold knight!

48
00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:47,920
There's a slip-up.
Looks as though the tournament

49
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,280
may be off.

50
00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:51,160
There's Cedric.
Look here, Cedric.

51
00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,880
You're in the armor now.
Fate has smiled upon you.

52
00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:56,040
Lucky stiff.
This is your big chance.

53
00:02:56,120 --> 00:02:58,040
Imagine...
You, Cedric, can be a hero.

54
00:02:58,120 --> 00:02:59,960
Win the glory,
riches and honor.

55
00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:03,240
To say nothing of the fair hand
of the princess Esmeralda.

56
00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,240
Think of it, Cedric.
The chance of a lifetime.

57
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:08,320
[crowd cheering]

58
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:10,200
[man] Now, coming out
on the field,

59
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,600
Sir Cumference, the champion.

60
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:18,920
Old Ironpants, they call him.
Never lost his seat in combat.

61
00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:20,960
Many a knight has gone down
in defeat

62
00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:24,200
beneath the hoofs
of his trusty war horse.

63
00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,880
Here we have the challenger.

64
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,680
It's the loyal Cedric,
doubling for Sir Loinsteak,

65
00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:30,680
willing to do or die
for his master.

66
00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:33,080
Or could it be
the fair princess, Esmeralda?

67
00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:36,800
[crowd cheering]

68
00:03:36,880 --> 00:03:38,000
[Esmeralda whistles]

69
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:41,560
[man] Looks like love
at first sight.

70
00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:45,400
With an inspiration like this,
how could anyone fail?

71
00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:48,400
[man shouting indistinctly]

72
00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,760
[man] Easy, there, Cedric.
Easy does it.

73
00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,400
The knights and horses
are in the starting gate.

74
00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,920
Battle stations,
visors down, lances set.

75
00:03:56,000 --> 00:04:00,120
Any minute now. Sir Cumference,
the champion, is the favorite,

76
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,080
anything can happen out here
this afternoon

77
00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:03,760
and probably will.

78
00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:06,320
The crowd is waiting
for the starting signal.

79
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:09,600
The fans are on their toes.
And there they go!

80
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:12,560
The champion is going to the
front. Here comes Cedric.

81
00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:15,280
Both move at a furious pace.
It's gonna be ghastly.

82
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:18,320
It's close. Cedric is on the
rail, here's the champion.

83
00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:21,280
- Coming up the line
of scrimmage. - [shrieking]

84
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:27,000
[grunting]

85
00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:29,440
[man] It's all over.
It's all over.

86
00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:33,320
With Sir Cumference
the winner and champion.

87
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,800
[all] Bravo, bravo.

88
00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:41,040
Boo! Boo!

89
00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:43,960
[man] Just a minute, folks.
Hold your horses. What's this?

90
00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:47,160
Yes, it is. Believe it or not,
Cedric is in there again.

91
00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:48,880
What a fighting heart.

92
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,440
The champion sets himself
for another charge.

93
00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,400
There's the windup, the pitch.
The champion connects.

94
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:56,320
A line drive going over
third base.

95
00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,560
No, a long foul ball
into the left field bleachers.

96
00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,640
Little Cedric is right back
in there.

97
00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:05,680
It's a hot knight we have
out there this afternoon.

98
00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:07,200
But the champion
is on his toes.

99
00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:09,280
That's a mighty fistful
of sword.

100
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,760
He means business.
He's going in for the kill.

101
00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:14,720
Poor Cedric. This looks like
the beginning of the end.

102
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:17,720
No knight living could stand up
under this powerhouse.

103
00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,320
It may be the kid's last ride,

104
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:21,080
but he's right in there
pitchin'.

105
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:22,400
And he connects.

106
00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:24,400
What a sock this
little fellow packs.

107
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,280
The champ rocks back
on this heels.

108
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,480
Cedric sprung a surprise
that time.

109
00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:31,960
But the champion is
slashing back now

110
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,600
with a right and a left.

111
00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:36,480
He's making every blow count.
One, two, three, oh!

112
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:38,400
No-holds-barred in this battle.

113
00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:39,880
[crowd shouting indistinctly]

114
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:41,480
[man] There's a smashing right

115
00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:43,760
and Cedric loses his head
for a moment.

116
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:48,440
Now the champion
takes one on the noggin.

117
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:50,920
- [whistles]
- [crowd cheers]

118
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:53,880
[man] The champ is taking more
time. He's lost confidence.

119
00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:55,800
This challenger is
no creampuff.

120
00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:57,840
He moves in and lets fly
with an attack.

121
00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,120
Left, right, left,
right, left, right.

122
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,000
The champ is throwing
everything he's got at Cedric.

123
00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:05,480
He can't take this bombardment
much longer.

124
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:08,720
Why doesn't somebody stop this?
It just don't seem human.

125
00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,360
It's unbearable.
There ought to be a law.

126
00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:13,160
Why, the whole suit will have
to be scrapped,

127
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,000
including Cedric.

128
00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:17,800
[drilling sounds]

129
00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:22,840
[man] But wait. The champion
seems to be tiring.

130
00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:25,400
Those blows are losing
some of their speed.

131
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:27,280
The champ is breathing
hard now.

132
00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:29,280
Again, we take you inside
with Cedric.

133
00:06:29,360 --> 00:06:31,120
Plenty cool, this boy.

134
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,760
Something's happening.
Let's have a look-see.

135
00:06:33,840 --> 00:06:36,640
Could it be that Ironpants
is beginning to weaken?

136
00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:39,640
Yes, he reels in his saddle.
He's going down!

137
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,400
Yes, he's down!

138
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:42,960
- Ya-hoo!
- That wraps it up, folks.

139
00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:46,400
The winner and new champion,
little old Cedric.

140
00:06:46,480 --> 00:06:50,000
That's the way it goes, folks.
Chump one day, champ the next.

141
00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:53,920
What a day for a knight
and what a knight for a day.

142
00:06:53,970 --> 00:06:58,520
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